Continuing in Boston

Good evening. I haven't posted in a while for various reasons. I really feel I need to be in the mood to write with any kind of clarity and I must stay that clarity is something I am striving to achieve. It has been almost 4 weeks since I up and left Virginia to start this new chapter in my life and I am enjoying it. It presents me with new challenges and new opportunities for success, at least on a personal level, that I would be completely oblivious of if I had stayed in the hell-hole that Virginia had become for me.

Today has been quite strange. I have been quite ill the past few days with what seems like a tough cold. However, with the new skills and new job I forced myself to work yesterday and today. The last thing I want to do is start skipping out on my responsibilities again. Work was fine, and I have plenty of reading material to accompany me through the various hours of the day and night. However, I miss the social joy that always brought me so much peace. I understand, however, that this time in my life needs to be devoted to my own self-growth and to do that I need to focus on ME.

Meditation has been difficult for me these past weeks since my mind is such a spinning mess, but I was able to effectively balance my chakras and meditate for about 12 minutes. I know this is almost no time and before I left Virginia I had been able to go 1 1/2 hours (still short, but I'm still beginning my journey of meditiation). I should be getting my ADHD meds soon though, so this will help.

I don't know if I said anything helpful in this blog, but it was nice to get some of this off my chest.

Love!

Dear readers, those who may happen upon my random blog,
I am in the process, regardless of the obvious fact that it is almost 3 in the morning, reading, no, rather devouring Mary Shelley's Frankenstein. A book which I always meant to read. Frankenstein was actually on my list of books to read. A couple of years ago I became fascinated with the origins of the famous fictional monsters of history. Bram Stoker's Dracula was my first endevour, and having an above average reading level, and the intense love and desire to read difficult literature, I loved every second of it. The differences that society, and especially cinema, have changed these monsters (whether making them "scarier" [usually by taking away the humanity so devoted in the originals] or humbling them to leave out some of the more gruesome details) entranced me and quickly moved to Robert Louis Stevenson's The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. I must note here that my criticism of the media is not to be taken too greatly as I must admit I avidly enjoyed the 1992 film "Bram Stoker's Dracula" especially for it's attention to detail to the original novel (a lack of attention to movies inpsired by books being one of my worst pet peeves). I mostly refer to the popular depictions of said monsters. However, I babble. Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde was close to the most exciting work of fiction for such a short narrative (with Of Mice and Men coming in close second). However, soon after my finishing the latter novel, I became entranced with some other humor of the arts and nearly forgot my former passion.
While at Borders, I was unsuccessful in aquiring a book which fancied my current taste (which ranged from Zorro by Isabel Allende to Secrets in the Shadows by VC Andrews). However, as if by fate, I discovered a copy of Frankenstein lying on one of the "School Books" displays (my most avid source of classics) and immedietly was drawn to buy it. It had sat in my room awaiting my attention for almost a week when, while frustrated at my slowness in reading legitamite Spanish literature (in Spanish), I opened Mary Shelley's classic.
I am merely on Chapter 2 and I am already filled with such enthusiasm and pure splendor that I immediately had to reflect on my feelings,the history of one of the periods of my literary life an aftermath of excitement which I find fills my blogs regularly. However, all of this is mostly to express my own excitement as well as to excite the mind of any who care to listen and who may have a love of literature similar to my own.

After all of that, I am excited also to say that in a strange lull of today's enlightened state, I have written a poem. The seeming dark tone of the poem is one that, although not so revealed so far in this blog, is commonplace in most of my poetry. I wish to express to the audience of my poetry that my deepest wish is to distance myself from the terrible description of "angst". Depressing imagery or content to me is simply a mould through which my current mindset must sculpt my art. I believe, however, that with close inspection to this poem in specific, the overall tone becomes one of hope, not despair.
_____________________________________________________________________________________

I am afraid to think.
Even now the looming ghostly shadows
of my mind prepare their assault.

To sleep, oh to sleep I must wrap my thoughts
(kindly at first, then insistant)
some desperate
some adventitious

And send them in a balloon

Till they reach those beautiful
edges of sight, sound, and attention
(that percieved humble abode of the Archangel Lucifer
O morning star, son of the dawn!)
which some nights yeild to bountiful dreams.

And in a dream the curtain of sanity may be lifted,
nay, must be lifted,
and the infinite expanse of the imagination,
symbolic, profound, and yet deeply confusing,

alights and sparks the unity and wholeness
fallen from heaven.
O Wisdom of my heart,
seek not death in the error of your life

I pray but this:
Let my life be a dream.
_____________________________________________________________________________________

Note: This poem is brand new and even in the transcribing of the text went through various editing.

Radiatore

Hello everyone. Forgive my lack of writing but as we all know, many things occur in this life which challenge us in one extreme or another. The past couple weeks have been a mess, basically, and I have been attempting to use all of my coping skills to deal with the things that have happened. I am not so arrogant as to say that I have the answers, for no matter how much we think we are spiritually ready for the trails and tribulations of this world, until you are in the middle of them, you have no idea. I have to say that I was not ready, though all of my work was not wasted for each time I am able to pull myself up (no matter how long it takes). I truly do believe that everything happens for a reason and that God, while giving us complete free will, presents opportunities to grow and learn. Every emotion and event on the "evil" or "bad" side of the emotional spectrum is also an opportunity to grow, even more so than the "good" I believe. It doesn't seem like it in the heat of the moment, but I believe even the horrible things on this Earth are a gift to make us stand up and do something! My blog is very scatterbrained today so forgive me, my mind is very scatterbrained at the moment. I had two very interesting dreams just now during my treasured after church nap. One was some strange events with a man I have feelings for and the other with a quite insane party with my roommate. I kept asking her for more and more candy (not drugs, though they may have been part of it, but literally candy like Skittles). Interesting... I must dwell on this a bit before I can offer myself interpretation.

The title of this post is the title of the piece I'm currently listening to by Ellen Band. It's very modern, and I'm glad I turned it on, because I haven't listened to anything truly modern in quite a few months. I would only reccommend it to those who truly enjoy avant-garde and post-avant-garde music.

Have a wonderful and peaceful day and week. Please accept the gift of my love which I share openly and freely!

-Brian Minnick

PS: Interesting... Despite my own lack of posting in a while, most of the blogs I follow have also yet to post, and if they have, they have done so in the same manner I have. That is, explaining the experience of deep change which is hindering writing (not a bad thing, just interesting). There is something really intense happening on Earth right now. I'm trying to be excited, but I also have a deep sense of uncertainty. Please, I beg you, help one another NOW! We are all going through some tough times and need each other. We are all ONE!

Insomnia

Well here I am, 3:16 in the morning and I'm still wide awake staring at the infinity of this computer screen. I have heard that the light of the computer screen actually keeps you awake. While I believe that this is possible, and probably true, I would much rather be "productive" ("" because I'm usually just refreshing my Twitter or reading articles, lol) than lying in bed with my eyes closed for 2 hours. I've taken my insomnia meds but all they are doing is making me yawn.

Oh well, I've lived with insomnia all my life. The night has become a second home. It is so beautifully different than the daytime. It is so mysterious and so creative. The energy of the moon is so different than that of the sun. I tend to prefer it, if only because is pours creative energy, healing, and mysterious wonder. I just love it.

My new found center has been tested to the extreme these past few weeks and I have to say, as I am only human, I have let the world and its crazy circumstances get to me. However, after some time I am able to find my center again and feel the warmth of the Eternal Breath.

At School

Good afternoon! I'm at school (George Mason University), and I have some free time so I decided to come on here and blog a little bit to pass the time. The past couple weeks have been difficult, with the new added stress of school, but I feel that my mood swings are getting less and less intense, and easier to control. Luckily, a steady regimen of meditating and spiritual work have helped me achieve a more balanced psyche and body. I had an intense meditation last night dealing with the Sufi mantra Al-Matin, commonly translated a patience. Of course this term is much more complicated, but patience is the large picture that I received. When I was in my meditative state, I allowed the troubles and wandering thoughts of my mind (usually held at bay to achieve clear-headedness) to speak one by one. All of a sudden all of my doubts and woes came through. Luckily, I was able to take each in turn and breath Al-Matin slowly and clearly so that patience would be learned and understood. I actually became emotional during this time (more of a revelatory emotional outburst than one of sadness). When I was finished I felt so light and wonderful. I believe that I now must add time in my meditation to not only reach my calm center, but then to take advantage of it to gain wisdom.

Thanks to HenkTerHeide on Twitter, I have found a new artist who absolutely blew my socks off. These futuristic fantasy paintings will truly make you think. Please don't miss out on experiencing this wonderful artist. His name is Jacek Yerka and I believe this link will most easily get you there. Please let me know what you think!

Have a wonderful and peaceful day!

It's Time to Open

Good afternoon all you brilliant people. I haven't written in a while, but that is mostly because life loves to throw huge stones that one must handle before forward-moving life can continue. Anyway, with the melodies of Anjulie blaring from my computer speakers, I wish to talk about something that has been a huge part of my spiritual growth.

As the title states, it is time to open. Open up to the world, to people, to nature, and most importantly, to ourselves. When we close or hold anything inside, we are not only placing burden's and stresses all over our body, but we are directly and indirectly influencing the cosmos. The human ability to use mirror neurons (neurons in premotor cortex and the inferior parietal cortex which allow humans and primates to copy what they see, or to feel emotions similar to those they witness) is a wonderful and beautiful instinct that help us on a daily basis. However, when we begin to harbor negativity, we have no ability to keep it completely to ourselves (why would we want to?). This negativity, even if it not seen consciously, is transmitted regardless to everyone you encounter.

Please, let us deal with our negativity head on! I once heard on the topic of obstacles (and forgive my paraphrase) that they are one of our greatest tools to reach enlightenment. When we actively pursue to better our lives by facing our problems head on, then regardless of the outcome, we have learned countless lessons. This is a life-long endeavor, and it is obviously easier said than done. Just remember, everyone, including you, makes mistakes, and that is perfectly fine. What is not fine, is when we harbor so much negativity, whether in the form of self-doubt or hatred, that we injure ourselves and those around us.

I have personally experienced all kinds of negativity as I have struggled with bi-polar disorder as well as ADD and ADHD. I have to share, however, that my life has changed in so many wonderful ways because of the past couple months of beginning to explore alternative healing. Meditation and research have shown me so many beautiful ways to explore my mind, body, and spirit.

That being said, my biggest point in opening up is being open-minded. I know that religion and spirituality are less than popular among youth today. However, whether or not you believe in the dogma or practices of a certain religion, we can learn so much from our fellow man. The Bible and the Qur'an are beautiful pieces of literature that can teach us a lot about surviving in a world that seems always out to get you. The teachings of the Eastern religions are powerful and almost magical, allowing one to experience their mind and soul in so many different ways. These are just a few examples of all the wonderful things we can learn from different religions. Try it out, it won't kill ya.

Lastly, this blog post was inspired by my new purchase of The Sufi Book of Life by Neil Douglas-Klotz. It is a collection of 99 Pathways of the Heart. It can be read straight through, or used like an oracle. Each pathway ends with a mantra and meditation that help you meditate on each new aspect of life. I am hooked.

Have a wonderful day everyone and remember OPEN UP!

Twitter

Strange title, I know. It seems everyone is obsessed with the Twitter Revolution. I myself have found great fun, and honestly, great information through Twitter. I use it every day to find out what my friends are doing, what my favorite stars are up to (since most actually write their own tweets), and to read new articles about things I'm interested in such as new music, meditation, and other forms of alternative healing. It has allowed me a new outlet to express myself and a less stressful outlet than websites like Facebook and Myspace (which I now use infrequently).

Anyway, I wanted to share some new stuff I've found. The American Monk is a wonderful blog where a wise man speaks about various topics including stress, meditation, and personal vision. I found it very helpful, including pursuing his meditation series. The first lesson includes a guided meditation called "The Daisy Pond" in which you create your own world in which to relax. It sounds so simple and yet, at least for me (I love creative things), gave me a wonderful imaginary place to do my meditations. Having just begun I don't know to what I extent I'll use it, but I love the concept and am going to use it. Check it out, I don't think you'll be disappointed.

If your on Twitter and are interested in various articles concerning alternative healing and self-awakening, follow VibesUP. They sell something or other which doesn't interest me too much, but they have so many resources and openly share them with the public. I love it.

One last thing. On PLANET UPGRADE, one of the blogs I follow (see left of page for link) I found this. The metaphor is a little out there, but I really enjoy the message.



That's all for now. Have a wonderful day!

PS: I think it is so funny that I keep thinking of new things to say. I guess it's ok to keep updating a blog until your satisfied. I want to recommend a book of short stories. It is called You Are Not a Stranger Here by Adam Haslett. It is a Pulitzer Prize Finalist and some of the most shocking and edgy short stories I have ever read. He has no qualms about hitting you upside the face with some very dramatic situations. Some are more intense than others, but so far they have all been extremely beautiful and worthwhile. Check it out.